Shattered Mission-10/6/2007

[lauren]

so good, please please write more, i love this story, please write more

[Steller's Jay]

Shattered Mission, Chapter 30

“It’s all right, Master,” Anakin murmured, as he gently extricated Obi-Wan’s fingers from his hair and moved his old master’s hands down to rest between them. “I am here with you,” he said softly, “and I won’t leave you.” Anakin continued with comforting, supportive words until he felt Obi-Wan’s body begin to relax, and then he just held him quietly, slowly rocking back and forth. As the tension left his body, Obi-Wan opened his eyes to see black material in front of him. He closed his fingers around it, breathed Anakin’s name, and allowed himself to fall asleep.

Soon, Anakin sensed someone at the door. “Come in, Oren. He is sleeping.”

The young man approached and stood next to Anakin, looking down at his master, concern and worry in his eyes. He knelt on the other side of Obi-Wan and asked, “Master Skywalker, what’s happened to him? He seemed to be himself when we left.”

Anakin turned his head, his blue eyes sad as they looked into Oren’s brown ones. “I think,” he began, but then he paused and turned his gaze back to his friend. With his flesh hand, he pushed some long strands of hair from Obi-Wan’s face, saying, “You know, he never really liked having his hair long before. I think he let it grow out after his trials because all of us do, we’re so happy to get rid of that buzz cut.” Oren watched as Anakin smiled a little and continued to move Obi-Wan’s hair back from his face. Finally, Anakin turned back to Oren and said, “I’m sensing guilt and pain in him, and fear. You should be able to sense that, too.” Oren nodded. Anakin continued, “I think the gravity of.....his situation finally caught up with him and it’s weighing heavily on him. I’m sure our argument didn’t help matters any.” Oren really wanted to know what that argument was about, but knew it wasn’t his place to ask.

After a few minutes of silence, he did ask, “Master Skywalker, what do you think the Council will do?”

Anakin looked at him and replied, “I honestly don’t know, Oren.”

“Well, surely they will understand that he...that it wasn’t really Master Kenobi who violated the Code. I mean, he didn’t even know there was a Code at that time, so how could he know he was violating it? I mean, he didn’t know he was a Jedi!” He huffed in frustration.

“I know what you mean, Oren,” Anakin said, smiling kindly at him. “The thing is, I don’t believe the Council will punish him, given the circumstances.” He looked down at Obi-Wan. “And that might be the worst thing they could do.”

Incredulous, Oren stared at Anakin, but just for a moment before he understood. “He believes he has done something terrible, and so from his point of view, he must be punished,” he said, gazing sadly at his master.

Anakin nodded. Oren laid his hand on Obi-Wan’s shoulder. Together, they waited silently, comforting their friend.

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Padme.

“Anakin,” she answered. From the chair at the end of the sofa, Yoda’s ears perked up. “Master Yoda is here with me. We’ve been chatting. He is pleased you are coming back with Obi-Wan.”

Yes, I can see him.

“Oh, I forgot.”

“Leave, I will, so privately you may speak,” Yoda said, preparing to get down.

“No, stay, Master Yoda,” she said quickly, holding her hand out.

Yes, Master Yoda, please don’t leave. I wanted to contact you, anyway.

“Very well, Master Skywalker,” Yoda replied, settling back in the chair. “Ready, I am.”

We will arrive in about two hours, and I would like the healers to be ready for us. I want to take Obi-Wan to them as soon as we land.

“Injured, he is?”

Not physically, Master. But he is under much stress. Padme and Yoda exchanged concerned looks. Padawan Kendrel and I are caring for him. He is asleep for now. I will explain later; it’s....complicated.

“Understand, I do and patient I will be.”

We will go to the healers’ landing area so we can take him directly to them. I think it would be best if there weren’t many waiting for us.

“Nothing will I say to anyone but Master Windu. Only he and I and Lady Skywalker will be there.” Padme nodded.

Thank you, Master.

“Leave I will now,” Yoda said, climbing down from his chair. “Lady Skywalker, thank you I do, for your hospitality and the opportunity to enjoy the younglings.”

“You are welcome any time, Master Yoda,” she said as he left. “Anakin, how is Obi-Wan?”

Not good, Padme. He’s overcome by it all, I think. He’s withdrawn into himself.

“Oh, dear. I hope you can help him, Ani.”

We’re helping him to stay calm, at least. I will see you soon, Padme.

“Yes, soon, my love.”

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Yoda, Windu and Padme waited on the landing pad, just outside the corridor which led to the healer’s rooms. A healer, Master Efram Laird, stood to the side meditating, reaching out to Obi-Wan to gain a sense of what was ahead for them.

“The healers will be able to help him, won’t they?” Padme asked. “Anakin is very worried.”

Mace’s warm brown eyes met hers as he replied, “They will do their best, Senator, of that we can be certain. When Anakin contacted you, did he tell you what happened to Obi-Wan?”

Padme looked away past the end of the landing pad and said, “Well, yes, he did mention that Obi-Wan was injured on Muunilinst, and that it had something to do with San Hill.”

When she disclosed no more, Mace cocked his head and said, “I suspect you’re not telling us everything, Senator.”

“Master Windu,” she replied, “I don’t feel it is my place to relate what occurred there. I am sure that my husband, if not Master Kenobi himself, will inform you in due time.” Yoda looked away to hide the smile on his face. Mace stared at her for a moment before frowning and turning to watch for the returning ship.

It wasn’t too long before Yoda pointed and said, “There.” All eyes moved to see Anakin’s ship descending toward them.

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“Master, we need to land now,” Sikka’s voice announced over the ship’s intercom. Anakin looked across Obi-Wan’s still form and ordered, “Oren, put us down.”

“Yes, Master Skywalker.” As Oren opened the compartment door, Anakin said, “And explain the landing procedure to Sikka as you go. There’s never a bad time to learn.” He smiled down at his old master, remembering that Obi-Wan had often said that to him during their missions. Sighing heavily, he waited for the ship to land.

---------

Padme’s heart fluttered a bit as the ship’s ramp hit the landing pad and she waited for that first glimpse of her husband. Then, there he was, striding quickly down the ramp, carrying Obi-Wan in his arms. He stopped in front of the small group, Oren and Sikka right behind him.

“Master Laird,” he began, but the healer interrupted him. “We are ready for Master Kenobi. I have a gurney just inside.”

“No, I will carry him,” Anakin insisted. “Let’s go.” With the healer leading the way, all hurried after him and into the healing center, and then into a room with a bed, some chairs, and very little else. Oren pulled back the bedcovers and Anakin tenderly placed his brother on the bed. Then he stood beside Padme, taking her hand in his.

Everyone watched as Efram placed his hands on Obi-Wan’s head and chest and closed his eyes. Nothing happened for several minutes until Efram opened his eyes and said, “Anakin, you could be a healer. You have calmed him and eased his pain as well as any of us could have. However, I need to know what he is feeling. And also what has caused this.” Efram looked at him expectantly. Reluctantly, Anakin let go of his hold on Obi-Wan’s pain. Almost immediately, Obi-Wan stiffened and let out a bark of anguish; then he rolled onto his side and curled up, holding his midsection. Efram again closed his eyes, and inhaled audibly, shocked by the onrush of intense guilt, anguish and pain. He looked at Anakin and said, “You must tell me what happened to him.”

Worriedly, Anakin watched for a moment and then surveyed the room. “I would like to speak alone with Master Laird first. And later with just Master Yoda and Master Windu.”

Windu looked at Anakin questioningly, but Yoda said, “Of course, Anakin. When ready you are, in my chambers you will find us. Take your time.” Mace nodded in agreement and followed Yoda from the room. Anakin turned to his wife. “Padme, I will come to our quarters as soon as I can. It may be awhile.” Standing on her toes, she touched his face softly and walked out. Anakin spoke over his shoulder, “Padawan, you and—” Oren interrupted. “I will stay with my master. It is where I should be.” Anakin turned around, but Oren continued, “Besides, my master has already told me what happened, and I belong at his side.” Nodding, Anakin agreed, “Yes, you are right, Oren. Sikka, you may leave.” She bowed and exited the room.

Anakin waited until Master Laird let go of Obi-Wan, and then both he and Oren began to tell him everything that happened on Muunilinst.

---------

After the lift door closed behind Padme, Mace turned to Yoda. Expecting him to say something about the situation they had just left, Yoda was surprised when Mace said, “Chancellor Organa informed me that the transport bearing San Hill and his legal team arrived several hours ago, and that San Hill is being held without bond. Of course, his attorneys protested.” A smile accompanied the last sentence.

“Serious charges these are against him,” Yoda said, “and treacherous, he is. Ignore we must not, the risk of flight.”

Mace spoke again. “I am concerned about how soon the trial will start. We need Obi-Wan to testify, and if he can’t be ready in time....” He shrugged, leaving the rest unsaid.

Yoda sighed, and then said, “Word of Obi-Wan’s condition, we must not allow to become public. Accelerate the start of his trial, Hill’s attorneys will.” The lift doors opened and they started down the corridor to Yoda’s quarters. “Faith I have in the healers, and young Skywalker as well. Between them all, Obi-Wan will improve and will testify.”

Mace nodded. “I will contact the Republic’s legal office and set up a meeting with the prosecutors for the case. I’ll let them know that Master Kenobi is ill, but we expect him to be ready for the trial as long as it is not too soon.”

---------

After Oren had related to Master Laird what he knew about events on Muunilinst and Anakin continued the tale, Oren moved to a chair next to his master’s bed. With the voices of Masters Skywalker and Laird behind him, he watched his own master. As Obi-Wan moaned and fidgeted and mumbled, somewhere between sleep and wakefulness, Oren thought, If only I could help him, help to heal him......His pain must be terrible. Almost involuntarily, he reached out with his hand and placed it on Obi-Wan’s. At once, his master’s hand gripped his as if he was a drowning man. Oren was both surprised and pleased to see the awful symptoms lessen. Obi-Wan’s eyes opened briefly to look upon his padawan, and then closed as his body relaxed somewhat, comforted by the human touch.

He knows he is not alone now. “I am here, Master,” he said softly. “I won’t leave you. I will stay with you until you are better.” It dawned on him that his voice was the only sound in the room. He turned to see both masters watching him. “I’m sorry,” he stammered. “I didn’t mean to interrupt, but..... I think my Master needs to not be alone.” He returned his gaze to Obi-Wan. “He needs to know someone is here, and I will stay with him so he is never alone.” He turned back. “Is—is that all right?”

Efram smiled and responded, “Of course, Padawan Kendrel, you may stay here with Master Kenobi. He will need all the care we can give him and you will be an important part of that.” He looked at Anakin. “Anakin, why don’t you go spend time with your family. I think this young man and I will begin Obi-Wan’s healing. We will call you if we need you.”

About to insist that Obi-Wan needed him, too, Anakin paused. Then, his brow softening and a smile touching his lips, he bowed and replied, “Of course, Master Laird.” As he closed the door behind him and left the healing center, he nodded, understanding that Oren needed some healing himself. He began walking easily through the temple, musing about all that had occurred lately. I think I’ll go meditate for awhile. Master Yoda said I could take my time. I’ll have to tell— “Padme!” He quickly changed his mind and hurried to their apartment.

He waved the door open without breaking his stride, only to find the front room empty. “Padme?”

“I think you should close the door, Anakin.” She appeared in the bedroom doorway, wearing—not very much at all. She had let her hair down and allowed it to fall strategically to the front. He inhaled sharply and then looked toward the twin’s room. “The children are still in the temple nursery,” she said, crooking her finger at him and going back into the bedroom.

Anakin dropped his cloak there on the floor and followed her eagerly, thinking, I’ll have to concentrate on keeping us shielded, but I think I can take care of two things at once!

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[sexystarwarslover]

that was a great chaptetr very interesting ending please write more, this is a good story

[Steller's Jay]

Shattered Mission, Chapter 31

“Thank you, Oren,” Efram said as the young man placed the tray holding a pitcher of water and several glasses on the table in the corner of the room.

“You’re welcome, Master,” Oren replied. “Would you like some now?”

Efram shook his head, replying, “Not quite yet, I think.” Oren returned to his seat by his master’s bed as the healer continued. “You would think that after all these centuries, the city could regulate—” “—humidity levels......do. All right......give me.............now, take his.........”

Occasional real-world words and phrases blended with the myriad of sounds, voices, images whirling through Obi-Wan’s thoughts. He tried to concentrate on what he knew was in the here and now, but it was impossible. No sooner would he grasp at a word from his padawan, than it would be obliterated by the thunder of his fears. His fears, and his guilt. So many disappointed in him, hurt by him......Janelle and her father, Oren, the Order itself. What if it became public knowledge? The Order would suffer credibility; Janelle and Willem would become the subject of gossip, derision. And Oren, wanting to be perfect, like his master. Perfect! He should be mortified to be the padawan of the only master, the only Council Master, the master of the Chosen One, ever to willingly enter into an intimate relationship!

And yet, he is here, I can feel him. Oh, why did I do it? Why? I am a Jedi to the core, why didn’t I stop? It matters not that I did not know who I was. Something deep inside me should have kept me from......that. Why?

And Janelle. I must let go of her, of my love for her. I let go of my attachment to Qui-Gon, when Qui-Gon died. Qui-Gon, my old master! Could he have stopped me? Where is he? He is disappointed in me, as well he should be. But, I need you, my master.

Ah, Oren. Yes, Oren. Thank you......

“Your touch comforts him, Padawan. It is good you will continue to stay. He needs you.”

“I will stay by my master’s side, Master Laird,” Oren said firmly, and the healer nodded knowingly.

---------

Over the next several days, Obi-Wan’s condition improved by degrees thanks to the presence and affection of his padawan and the healing skills of Efram Laird. He was now, at least, able to move from his bed and meditate. His pain had lessened, but guilt still hung over him like a heavy fog. Even as he feared the Council Masters would banish him from the Order, he feared they would not. Meditation was difficult, his fears intruding and keeping him from serenity. Something had to be done, but what? He worried that Qui-Gon was silent......to him, anyway. Anakin had come by and apologized for their argument on the ship, but Obi-Wan had not said much, merely a few words and a thank you. Later, guilt had assailed him once again over his curtness to his friend, his best friend.

On this day, he was sitting on the edge of his bed, head down and tired, when he noticed a shadow cross the floor. Inwardly, he sighed, desiring to be left alone. He turned to see who was there, expecting to see Oren returning from an errand for Efram.

“Master Windu,” he said, getting to his feet. “I did not know you.....were c—coming,” he stammered and dropped his head. So, what would you have done if you had known?

“Hello, Obi-Wan,” Mace replied, his expression neutral. “I had not planned on stopping by, but I have someone here who was eager to meet you.” At this, Obi-Wan looked up and watched as Mace brought forward a child, a Teevan boy. He marveled as the tall master smiled warmly at the boy and said to him, “Look at his eyes, Toller.” As those dark eyes slowly made their way up to Obi-Wan’s, Mace continued, “Obi-Wan, this is the boy who helped Anakin find you. His name is Toller Kien.”

“Hello,” Obi-Wan said, nodding his head.

“Toller, this is Master Obi-Wan Kenobi.” Obi-Wan exhaled slightly, relieved to know that he was still a Master.

The little boy walked right up to him and spoke, syllables oozing from his mouth as he struggled to communicate aloud. “Maaasssssster Kenobi.” He had been practicing ‘Kenobi’. “I.... (pause, mouth open) ...am peh....peh........pleeeased (accent on the ‘d’, and a breath) to mmmeeeet (accent on the ‘t’) you.” He grinned and held up his hand. Before taking it, Obi-Wan looked questioningly at Mace, who said, “He is learning to speak aloud. He knows the language, but has never spoken before. Anakin and I have been teaching him to express his thoughts verbally. Of course, Anakin can converse with him through the Force.”

Obi-Wan smiled down at the boy and took his hand. “Thank you, Toller Kien. I am pleased to meet you, as well. And I thank you for assisting in my return to the Temple.” His eyes widened as he sensed the turbulence of the little boy’s Force presence. And yet, he felt a sense of wellbeing flow into him at the touch of the small hand. Toller’s smile grew with pleasure at Obi-Wan’s words.

Mace went to sit on one of the chairs, so Obi-Wan followed him to the next one; Toller sat on the floor between them quietly. “How are you, Obi-Wan? The reason I ask is that San Hill’s lawyers are insisting that his trial begin immediately. I believe they found out that you have been unable to leave the temple in order to testify against him.”

“Trial?” Obi-Wan asked, puzzled. He hadn’t been thinking about San Hill at all. Mace watched as Obi-Wan looked aside, searching his memory.

“You do remember what happened on Muunilinst?”

Obi-Wan nodded slowly as the memories came to him. “Ah, yes,” he said, “I do. Oren and I were looking for him. We were near his estate and were attacked by his people. I was hit—” He looked down and touched his side. “—here, with a blaster shot. It knocked me off the cliff.” He looked up at Mace. “The last thing I remember is.....the sky.”

“Do you feel well enough to leave here and testify in court?” Mace asked.

“Yes, I believe so,” Obi-Wan replied. “I would like to return to my own quarters, anyway.”

Mace slapped his thighs and rose. Toller stood next to him. “Good. I will speak to Master Laird to have you released, and I will ask the prosecutors to call you as late in the proceedings as they can. Take care of yourself, Obi-Wan.”

“Thank you, Master Windu,” Obi-Wan said, as they left his room. He could tell there was a conversation going on down the corridor, and shortly Master Laird and Oren walked in. Oren was smiling.

“So, Obi-Wan,” Efram began. “Master Windu said you feel well enough to leave us?”

“Yes, I do,” Obi-Wan replied.

Efram laid his hand on Obi-Wan’s shoulder and said, “Then you are free to go, Obi-Wan. Remember, we are here for you if you feel the need to return.”

“I still have much to work through, but I thank you for your help, and Oren’s,” he said, turning his head to his padawan. He bowed to the healer and said, “Now I must gather up my things and take my leave of you, Master Laird.”

As Efram left the room, Obi-Wan picked up his cloak, scanned the room and said, “Well, nothing left to gather, Oren.”

“No, Master,” he replied, following Obi-Wan out the door. “I am happy you are feeling better.”

“You were a large part of that, Padawan, and I cannot thank you enough. So, at least I can function, now,” he replied with a slight wry smile, but Oren could still see the pain in the eyes of his master, who saw his worried look. “It is all right, Oren. I will spend much time in meditation. Do not worry about what the Council will do. They are wise and will do what is best for the Order.”

What is best for the Order, Oren thought, as he followed his master down the corridor. That is what I am afraid of.

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Anakin’s family was seated in one of the outdoor contemplation gardens enjoying the warmth of the day and being occasionally visited by knights, masters with their padawans, and groups of younglings, all of whom came to pay their respects and see the children of the Chosen One. Padme, beginning to feel confined in their apartment however nice it was, had suggested they start receiving visitors outside. That was fine with Anakin, so here they were. Sikka sat on the ground, watching the babies on their blanket. They had learned to crawl, and her responsibility was to keep them from going too far. Leia was the more adventurous of the two, Luke seeming to be content with watching his sister, so Sikka’s task kept her busy gathering up the tiny girl and playing with her for awhile.

Padme noticed Anakin staring at the temple. Understanding his intent, she called his name. “Anakin?” He appeared to pull back into himself before he turned to face her. “How is Obi-Wan?” she inquired.

“He is meditating,” he answered her. “But it’s not coming easily. I’m going to go see him.” As he stood, she squeezed his hand and nodded, happy that he was going. He had been brooding about his friend lately. They needed each other.

As Anakin approached the meditation room, he found Obi-Wan in the corridor, arms folded into his cloak, and staring out a window. Anakin noted that his hair had been cut short and he had a good start on his facial hair. Obi-Wan turned, his face softening, and greeted him. “Anakin. It is good to see you. I sensed that you were coming.”

To Anakin, he seemed a bit tentative, which put Anakin a little tentative, as well. “Hello, Obi-Wan,” he said, waiting to see what the older man would say. Sounds in the temple felt louder as the silence deepened between them. Then they spoke at the same time.

“Anakin—”

“Obi-Wan—”

They both smiled, and Anakin said, “You go, Obi-Wan.”

“Very well,” he replied and, looking into his brother’s eyes, he continued, “My friend, I want to apologize for the way I treated you when you came to see me. You were concerned for my welfare and I shut you out.”

“Obi-Wan,” Anakin began, but Obi-Wan interrupted.

“No, let me finish. You mean so much to me, Anakin, more than I can say, really. I would never to do that you, and it pains me that I did. I want you to know that I am glad you visited me. It is just that, the place I was in, I was not thinking—” The rest of his words were muffled as Anakin embraced him and held him tightly for a long moment. “I’ve missed you, Obi-Wan,” he said softly. They held each other for what seemed a lengthy time, but really wasn’t. When they separated, both men’s eyes were wet, but they were smiling and happy. “I’m so glad you are back, Master.”

“I am, too, Anakin,” Obi-Wan replied, as he turned and they began to walk together down the corridor.

“How are you, Obi-Wan? It is hard for you, isn’t it.”

“Yes, it is very hard, my friend. I begin to meditate and then the fear intrudes.”

“What are you afraid of?” Anakin asked. He had never seen his brother that way.

“It is difficult to express, Anakin,” Obi-Wan replied. “I have never felt like this before. After I was brought to the temple as a child and began to learn, I always felt confident and sure of myself and my place here. Now, with what has happened, with.....what I have done, I am no longer sure of anything. This uncertainty is foreign to me and......exhausting.”

“You can be sure of one thing, Obi-Wan,” Anakin said. “I will always be here for you.”

Obi-Wan smiled over at him and replied, “Thank you, my friend. That is the one thing I was sure I could count on.”

Anakin stopped and said, “Oh, I almost forgot!” Obi-Wan stopped as well, to see his friend rummaging through the folds of his cloak. Finally, he pulled out something, saying, “Here, I made this for you. Part of your old belt was missing, so I made you a new one.”

Obi-Wan took the new belt from Anakin’s hands and stared at it lying across his palms. “Anakin, it’s black.” He looked up in wonder at his friend.

“I know, Obi-Wan,” he replied, grinning. “You need to live a little. You’re so serious all the time.”

The Jedi Master actually chuckled at that. “Thank you, my brother. I will wear it proudly.”

As they began walking again, Anakin asked, “I have noticed that piece of leather tied around your wrist, Obi-Wan. Why is it there?”

With a heavy sigh, Obi-Wan explained the ceremony in which he and Janelle had made a life bond. “I will not remove it until I have spoken with her again. I owe her that much.”

“Come,” Anakin said after a moment, “I will meditate with you. And I promise to be still.”

“Thank you, my friend,” Obi-Wan said as they entered another meditation room. Anakin’s presence soothed him as he felt the Force begin to fill him.

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[sexystarwarslover]

that was so cool and heartwarming, love it and can't wait for more!

[Steller's Jay]

Shattered Mission, Chapter 32

The Justice Center of the Republic was a large, dark building in the shape of a sphere with the bottom sliced off; the lower, underground floors housed prisoners awaiting trial or transport to a penal facility. In an effort to convey equal justice for all, the Center’s architect had designed two structures on opposite sides of the sphere, about one-third of the way down from the top to the middle of the building. Each was supposed to represent a hand of Justice, and lying on the “palm” of each was a black sphere. The general consensus among the populace and tourists was that they made the building appear that it was about to take flight. Anakin had always thought that, from the right angle, the building looked like the head of a giant rodent with strange ears.

Inside, Masters Skywalker and Kenobi and their padawans waited in the witness preparation room down the hallway from Courtroom Number One. All but Sikka Doron would be called to testify, hopefully today, about the events on the planet Muunilinst. She and her master passed the time reviewing one of her lessons. Oren and his master were seated in two comfortable chairs, angled slightly toward one another.

“Master, I think you are much better than when we first returned to the temple. But, you are still troubled.”

Obi-Wan shifted his gaze to his padawan. “You are very perceptive, my young padawan. Of course, the mere fact that I am moving on my own power is a definite improvement.” Oren looked sharply at his master and saw the corners of his mouth turned up slightly. As Obi-Wan continued speaking, Oren looked away in wonder only to see Master Skywalker looking at him and nodding. Only last week Oren had remarked sadly to him that his own master wasn’t funny any more, and never cracked any jokes. Anakin had told him to be patient. Oren smiled and turned back to Obi-Wan. “So, are you comfortable with your testimony?”

“Yes, Master, but I wanted to ask you something. When we were nearing—” He stopped when Obi-Wan held up his hand.

“Caution, Padawan. Remember, we are not to discuss this among ourselves. Only because we are Jedi are we permitted to be in this room together.”

“I am sorry, Master. I guess I forgot,” Oren replied.

At that moment, Anakin was summoned to the courtroom by a bailiff. “May the Force be with you, my brother,” Obi-Wan said to him as Anakin walked through the door.

As the bailiff closed the courtroom door behind them, the lead Republic prosecutor, Stans Leftin, waved Anakin up to the witness stand. Anakin stared at San Hill, seated at the defense table and surrounded by several attorneys. The tall Muun stared back imperiously, but his gaze faltered quickly in the face of the Jedi’s piercing blue eyes. After he agreed to tell the truth, Anakin lowered himself onto the witness chair and the prosecutor began.

“Master Skywalker, please tell us how the Jedi Order became aware of Master Kenobi’s disappearance.”

“I told Master Yoda and Master Windu that he was gone, but that I didn’t believe he was dead.”

“And how did you know that he was gone?” Leftin asked expectantly.

Anakin took a breath and said, “I share a.....special bond with Obi-Wan.”

“Obi-Wan being Master Kenobi?” Leftin prompted.

“Yes,” Anakin replied.

“Please continue. Explain this ‘special bond’ to us.”

“Well, it’ll be hard to explain to those who don’t have the Force, but I’ll try. I feel Obi-Wan’s presence all the time; it’s always there and I often don’t think about it. It’s like.....like a sound you get used to, like a fountain. You’re so used to it, you don’t think about it until it’s gone.” He looked toward the door through which he’d entered the courtroom. “One day it just stopped; I couldn’t feel him any more.”

The prosecutor said, “But you say you knew he wasn’t dead?”

Anakin looked down at his lap before continuing. “That is what I said to Master Yoda and Master Windu, but I have to admit I really wasn’t sure. I didn’t want it to be true.” After a moment, he resumed his testimony. “I was asleep and I had a dream, a vision, of falling—”

“Objection!” Everyone turned to the defense table, where one of the attorneys was standing. “How is this relevant? This is nothing but mumbo-jumbo! Visions! Dreams! Is there any proof of this? How are we—”

The judge’s gavel silenced him. “Mr. Matesky!” the judge thundered, staring at the attorney. “I have noted your objection. This part of Master Skywalker’s testimony may not be relevant, but it is interesting. And it is certainly not damaging to you client.” He turned to Anakin. “I gather that you have had visions before?”

“Yes, your Honor,” Anakin replied, “and they often predict the future, or a possible future. Not everything I envision comes to pass.”

“Very well,” the judge said, nodding. “Continue with your testimony.”

“Well, I had a dream of falling, as if I was the one falling, but I felt it was of someone else. It was when I awoke from that dream, that I realized I could no longer feel Obi-Wan’s presence. And then I knew it was he that had fallen....or would fall.”

The prosecutor said, “And what did you do then?”

“I and my student left at once for the Jedi Temple. On the way, I contacted Masters Yoda and Windu and told them that I suspected something had happened to Master Kenobi. When we arrived on Coruscant, the Jedi Council decided that I should go to Muunilinst to find Obi-Wan and to complete his mission.”

“And what was his mission, Master Skywalker?”

“He and his padawan, Oren Kendrel, were to find one of the Separatist leaders, Shu Mai of the Commerce Guild and return her to Coruscant to stand trial.”

“Very well,” Leptin said, “please continue.”

“Because we had not heard from Padawan Kendrel, we feared something had happened to him, as well. So, we tried to find him within the Force.” Anakin watched San Hill’s attorney, Matesky, as he continued to speak. “My padawan, who is Sikka Doron, recognized Padawan Kendrel’s Force presence—”

“Objection!” Matesky was again standing at the defense table. Anakin rolled his eyes.

“Noted, and overruled, Sir,” the judge said, waving the attorney back onto his seat. He turned back to Anakin. “Master Skywalker, I would love someday to learn more of your use of the Force. For now, please go on.”

“Yes, your Honor. Once we found Oren within the Force, I contacted him—.” He stopped and looked at the judge. “I am able to converse with other Jedi through the Force, your Honor.” The judge nodded appreciatively. “Oren told me what happened to both of them. He said a native told them—”

“Objection,” Hill’s attorney said in a sing-song voice.

“Objection sustained,” the judge said. “That is hearsay, Master Skywalker. We will hear young Kendrel’s own words soon enough.”

Stans Leptin approached Anakin and said, “Just tell us what you did, please.”

Perplexed, Anakin wondered how he was supposed to continue without explaining what Oren had told him. “Well,” he began slowly, “after we found Oren, I looked over the area where Oren said—” He caught himself. “—where Obi-Wan had fallen. From what I could see, I believed he had been taken away by two persons. There were drag marks and two sets of footprints, which stopped abruptly, indicating they’d left in a landspeeder or some other type of vehicle.” He paused, waiting to see if anyone was going to object this time. When no one spoke, he resumed. “I also found Obi-Wan’s utility belt and lightsaber. His belt had been torn apart and the ends melted.” He looked at the judge. “Based on my experience, it had been hit by blaster fire.”

There was a murmur in the courtroom; Anakin waited a bit until it quieted. “I decided to confront San Hill, so I entered his estate, dispatched a few of his men who attacked me, and found him inside the house. Based on the events related to me by Padawan Kendrel, I accused Hill of attempted murder of a Jedi Knight and kidnapping and unlawful confinement of a Jedi padawan. He, of course, denied everything, but he did give me Kendrel’s lightsaber, saying it had been found outside his property.”

Prosecutor Leptin stood again and asked, “Did you have any other dealings with San Hill, Master Skywalker?”

Anakin replied, “Yes, I saw him once more. In carrying on with Master Kenobi’s mission, I and Padawan Kendrel and Padawan Doron visited two of San Hill’s relatives, believing that he would have hidden one or more of the Separatists there. We found Hill at the home of his cousin, Layneer Hill. San Hill produced two of the Separatist leaders, Shu Mai and Poggle the Lesser. They were soon returned to Coruscant and Obi-Wan’s mission was complete.”

“And, I believe your testimony is complete; you have no more information relevant to this trial, correct?” Leptin asked.

“That is correct,” Anakin replied.

“Mr. Matesky,” began the judge, “you may cross-examine Master Skywalker.”

Matesky held up his hand as he consulted with his client. He shook his head a couple of times and then turned to face the judge, as San Hill huffed angrily.

“I have no questions for this witness, your Honor.”

“Very well. Prosecutor Leptin, please call your next witness. Master Skywalker, you may step down.”

As Anakin walked through the courtroom, he heard the prosecutor state that the holo-recorded testimonies of Janelle Sumter and Willem Jurgen would be heard after a lunch recess. A bailiff closed the door behind him and he returned to the witness preparation room.

---------

[sexystarwarslover]

oh so cool, can't for more

[Steller's Jay]

Shattered Mission, Chapter 33

“How did it go, Anakin?” Obi-Wan asked as his former apprentice returned to the witness preparation room.

“All right, I suppose,” he replied, taking a seat next to Obi-Wan; Oren and Sikka were talking quietly on a sofa by the window. “But, I think they should have had Oren testify before me. Every time I mentioned something Oren told me, Hill’s attorney objected, saying it was hearsay.” He shrugged and shook his head.

“What did the defense ask you?” Obi-Wan inquired.

“Nothing,” Anakin said. “It looked like Hill wanted him to cross-examine me, but he didn’t. I expect they’re waiting for your padawan to take the stand.”

“Yes, they probably think they can tear apart his testimony,” Obi-Wan mused, stroking his beard and watching his apprentice. “But, I’m sure Oren can hold his own. I have no concern about that.”

“What about you, Obi-Wan? Are you ready?” Anakin asked, concern for his friend evident in his tone.

Giving Anakin a sidelong glance for a moment, Obi-Wan said, “Yes, I am ready, my brother. I am quite recovered, both physically and emotionally.” Anakin wondered if his brother was being completely honest, or was only fooling himself. Obi-Wan looked tired and drawn. “I thank you for your concern, though.” They were silent for a moment and then Obi-Wan asked, “Why haven’t they sent for Oren, yet?”

Anakin didn’t want to let Obi-Wan know what was going on in the courtroom, so he prevaricated. “As I was leaving, they were getting ready for some other testimony. I’m sure they’ll be here soon.” He looked away toward the two padawans.

Knowing his former padawan well, Obi-Wan felt something was being withheld. It could be only one thing. He said nothing until Anakin turned back to him, and then he said, “It is the testimony of Janelle and Willem.” It was a statement, not a question. Anakin saw something in his brother’s eyes. Sorrow? Pain? Obi-Wan continued, “Prosecutor Leptin and I spoke yesterday. He told me they had been interviewed by both sides and that their statements had been accepted and holo-recorded.”

Just then the door to the room opened and a bailiff entered. “Padawan Oren Kendrel? The court is ready for you.” Sikka patted Oren’s hand as he stood and walked to the door. Obi-Wan nodded encouragement to him.

---------

Leptin patiently walked Oren through his rendition of the events on Muunilinst. Curiously, San Hill’s attorney made no objections during Oren’s testimony, even though Hill was obviously pushing him to do so.

“I have no more questions,” prosecutor Leptin said, taking his seat at the prosecution table.

“Mr. Matesky,” intoned the judge, “you may now cross-examine this witness.”

The attorney pushed his chair back from the defense table, sighed theatrically and stood. Carrying some pages, he approached the witness stand. “Padawan Kendrel,” he began, “....it is Padawan, correct?” At Oren’s nod, he asked, “Pray tell, young man, what kind of title is ‘Padawan’?”

“‘Padawan learner’ is the name of the final stage in a Jedi’s progression to knighthood,” Oren replied, watching him carefully.

“And when will you become a knight, Padawan Kendrel?” Matesky asked.

Before responding, Oren glanced at prosecutor Leptin, whose facial expression indicated he, too, was wondering where this line of questioning was headed. Oren cleared his throat and said, “Not for many years, sir. I have much yet to learn from my master, and when he feels I am ready, he will approach the Jedi Council to request permission for me to take the Trials.”

Expecting another question about the Trials, Oren was surprised when the man simply nodded and said, “Ah, yes, yes, yes, I see.” Matesky perused his notes for a moment and, just as the judge was about to admonish him, said, “Now, you have testified that it was my client’s security force that attacked you, Master Kenobi, and...” He glanced at his notes and continued. “...Jaden-Ong, one of the smaller natives who accosted you in the capital city, Harnaidan.” He looked at Oren and asked, “What led you to believe that your attackers were my client’s people? Were they dressed in the same uniforms?”

“They took me to your client’s property and locked me underneath a barn floor, as I testified,” Oren replied, looking Matesky in the eye.

“But how could you be sure Mr. Hill’s people were part of the attacking force? You said there was a second group appeared during the battle. Who is to say that they had not come to stop the attack, to save you and your Master?”

“No, they were attacking us—”

“Are you sure, Padawan Kendrel? Did you actually see anyone from the second group fire on you?” Matesky was leaning on the witness stand railing.

“Yes, I saw them fire,” Oren replied testily. “They—”

“How do you know they were firing at you?” Matesky interrupted, leaning in closer. “They could have been firing on your attackers!”

“No! No, that isn’t what happened!” Oren argued, rising to his feet and glaring at the smug attorney. “None in the initial force turned to defend themselves. In fact, they allowed the new force to come through.”

“Padawan Kendrel,” interrupted the judge. “Please, sit down.”

Oren looked at the judge in surprise, and then faced Matesky. As he resumed his seat, he said, “Besides, once my master had been hit and I was down, the battle stopped. Everyone returned to San Hill’s property.”

“Still,” Matesky added, “is it possible that the first attack was a mistake, and that the late-arriving force came to stop them?” Oren stared at him. “Is it possible?”

The young man’s gaze moved about the courtroom as he thought. Of course, it was possible, anything was possible. Finally, he spoke. “Yes, it is possible, but—”

“Thank you, Padawan Kendrel,” Matesky said airily as he returned to the defense table, knowing he might have planted a seed of doubt. “That will be all.”

“Prosecutor Leptin?” the judge inquired. “Do you wish to re-direct?”

“Yes, your honor,” Leptin said, rising but not leaving the table. “Padawan Kendrel, do you believe the situation was as Mr. Matesky has presented it?”

Oren straightened himself in the chair and replied confidently, “No, I do not. I neither saw nor heard admonishments to cease firing until I was down and my master had been shot and disappeared over the cliff.”

“Thank you,” Leptin said, taking his seat. “No more questions, your honor.”

The judge turned to Oren and said, “You may leave, young man.”

Oren rose, bowed to the judge and walked out of the courtroom. Upon entering the witness preparation room, his master walked to him and asked, “How do you feel, Padawan?”

Oren took a breath and replied, “I am...a little angry, Master, but overall I am content in that I told the truth.”

“And, your anger....?”

“The defense attorney tried to twist what I said about the attack.” He looked down, thoughtfully. Obi-Wan waited patiently. Oren raised his gaze and said, “I think he was trying to raise doubt about the intent of Hill’s forces.” Still Obi-Wan said nothing, but kept his warm brown eyes on his apprentice. “I guess that is what defense attorneys do to help their clients. But, he did not help San Hill, this time.”

“Good job, lad,” Obi-Wan said, affectionately grabbing Oren’s shoulder. “I am sure your testimony came across as sincere and believable. You know, we Jedi are sometimes called to testify in court, albeit usually only as witnesses. This was a good first time for you.” They walked together over to the room’s single window, which overlooked one of the city’s spaceports. “I want you to know, Oren, that I am very proud of you, and not only for today’s events. Since you became my student you have progressed rapidly, and you are devoted to the Order. You have learned much, and I know you will become an upstanding Jedi knight.”

“Only with your help, my master,” the young man replied. A pained expression briefly crossed Obi-Wan’s face, causing Oren to wonder and to ask, “Master?”

“It is nothing, young one,” the older man said, smiling gently at him.

Oren watched his teacher walk to the table he shared with Master Skywalker. As the two of them began speaking, he pondered what he had seen in his master’s expression. He inhaled sharply and his eyes widened as a thought came to him. Out of the corner of his eye, a motion caught his attention; Sikka was waving at him to come and join her. So, he did.

“What’s wrong, Oren?” she asked. “Something is troubling you?”

He looked at her briefly and then stared down at the table top. “I think my master believes the Council is going to expel him from the Order.”

Sikka gasped and placed her hand on his arm. “No, Oren. They wouldn’t do that. Master Kenobi is venerated within the Order; they would never expel him.”

He looked up at her and said, “I think he fears they will because of....because of the woman on Muunilinst.”

“But he didn’t know who he was, Oren,” she said, earnestly. “They cannot fault him for that. Surely, they can’t.”

He merely shook his head and watched his master.

---------

Shortly, it was Obi-Wan’s turn to present his testimony. As he entered the courtroom, he noticed and nodded to Masters Yoda and Windu, seated in the back of the room. As he walked forward and his gaze moved over the gallery, the prosecution and defense tables, the judge, and to the witness stand, he suddenly felt hot and flushed as if in embarrassment. Irrationally, he was overcome with a fear that everyone here knew of his relationship with Janelle. He grabbed hold of himself mentally and continued on to the stand, where he seated himself and waited, breathing deeply and evenly.

Prosecutor Leptin rose and approached him. “Master Kenobi, others have given us their versions of what occurred on your mission to find Shu Mai and on Muunilinst. Please tell us, in your own words, of your experiences.”

Obi-Wan related to the court what they had found on Mustafar and Geonosis, and their suspicion that a trap was being laid for them on Muunilinst. He also spoke of Jaden-Ong, the Muun-Doh who had led them to San Hill’s estate and who they believed was part of the trap, and of the subsequent attack near the cliff’s edge.

“Unfortunately, when the second wave of forces arrived,” he continued, “there were too many for Oren and me to defend ourselves. I saw Oren fall and the attackers swarm over him, and then I believe I was hit by blaster fire right here, where my utility belt lies.” He pointed to his new belt. “The blast knocked me over the cliff, and all I remember is the sky above me, a sharp pain, and then nothing. I believe my head must have hit something, which knocked me unconscious. When I came to, which I was told was several days later, I met the people who saved my life.”

“And what happened next?” Leptin inquired.

“As I began to talk to them, I realized I did not know who I was,” Obi-Wan replied. There was a small buzz in the courtroom, and the judge demanded silence. “These good people who nursed me back to health, I discovered later, knew of the Jedi Order, but had never seen a knight. Without my lightsaber and my belt, I was only a man to them. I stayed with them for several months until Master Anakin Skywalker found me.”

“And then your memory returned?”

Smiling a little, Obi-Wan said, “Well, it didn’t just return. I would say it almost knocked me over. Master Skywalker’s Force presence is very strong; it shattered the ‘wall’ behind which lay my memory. I returned to the Jedi Temple and learned of all that had occurred during my absence. I was very pleased to see my apprentice alive and well.”

“Thank you, Master Kenobi,” Leptin said. “I have no more questions.” He returned to his seat. Obi-Wan watched San Hill’s attorney approach him.

A look of concern on his face, Matesky said, “That must have been very disconcerting, Master Kenobi, to not know who you were. Frightening, one might say.”

“Yes, it was disconcerting,” Obi-Wan replied.

“So, you had no idea of your membership in the Jedi Order, along with all of its codes and rules?”

His stomach tightening, Obi-Wan swallowed and said, “That would be correct, sir.” He looked over at the prosecutor.

“Therefore, you could have broken any number of those rules, yes?”

“I...yes, but I don’t see what—”

“Objection!” Leptin shouted, rising from his seat. “Your Honor, these questions have nothing to do with this trial. Anything that might have occurred during Master Kenobi’s recuperation is irrelevant here! San Hill is on trial, not Master Obi-Wan Kenobi.”

“I tend to agree, Prosecutor Leptin,” the judge responded. “Mr. Matesky, I am going to sustain this objection unless you can provide a reason not to.”

“Your Honor, may we confer?” Matesky asked.

Obi-Wan watched the attorneys cluster at the judge’s bench. As the three men murmured to each other, he was able to catch some words now and then. They’re talking about Janelle and me! But, how would they know? He listened further. A witness?! Who...? Jeremy! The boy...... I could see he was angry I was there. He must have been fond of Janelle and thought she would return his affection. But, why is he bringing this up? To invalidate my testimony. If I would lie about this, then my entire testimony would be suspect.

He stared down at his hands in his lap, and then looked sadly to the Jedi Masters in the courtroom. Yoda’s expression was full of compassion; Windu’s was angry. They knew what was happening here. Taking a deep breath, Obi-Wan stood and turned to the bench.

“Your Honor, I would like to make a statement,” he said quietly.

The judge held up his hand to stop the arguing attorneys and looked at Obi-Wan.

“Master Kenobi?”

“I said I would like to make a statement, Your Honor,” Obi-Wan replied. “I should be able to clear up this matter.”

The judge turned to the attorneys. “Please sit, gentlemen.” Back to Obi-Wan, he said, “Go ahead. Make your statement.”

Obi-Wan faced the gallery and began to speak. “Willem Jurgen and his daughter, Janelle Sumter, are the kind people who took me to their ranch and brought me back to health. Since I had no idea who I was, and with others apparently trying to kill me, we all agreed I should stay on with them until my memory returned.” He paused for a moment to gather his thoughts. “As time passed, Miss Sumter and I grew fond of each other. This fondness grew into a deep affection, possibly even...love.” There was no response in the courtroom, which surprised him. “Not knowing my status anywhere, perhaps I was already married or there was some other reason that would prohibit marriage, I did not tell her of my feelings for some time.” An affectionate smile appeared on his lips as he said, “Her father, however, could see how we felt about each other, and his advice was to acknowledge our feelings and deal with any repercussions as they came along. This we did.” He stopped speaking.

The judge waited a few seconds and then began, “Master Ken—”

“For the reasons I have mentioned, we did not marry, but we did perform a bonding ceremony, a local custom that promises a future marriage while allowing a couple to be together, to.....share intimacy.” Silence ensued.

“And.....now?” the judge asked.

“I have broken that bond. After my memory returned and I realized who I was and what I had done, that was thing only possible action. I await the Jedi Council’s decision on my fate.” With that, he sat and bowed his head.

The judge turned to the defense table, where San Hill’s lawyer fumed. “Do you want to cross-examine this witness, Mr. Matesky?”

“No, your Honor,” the lawyer replied.

“Then you may go, Master Kenobi, unless the prosecution has any questions?” He looked to the prosecution table, where Leptin shook his head. “Very well. Thank you, Master Kenobi.”

Obi-Wan rose and made his way slowly down from the witness stand and toward the courtroom exit. Master Yoda sadly bowed his head. Master Windu faced sternly ahead.

---------

They watched as Obi-Wan entered the room and took a seat across the small table from Anakin. Oren and Sikka had never seen such a look of defeat on the master before; she took her friend’s hand. Anakin searched his old master’s face before he spoke to him through the Force. Obi-Wan?

They know everything now. I had to tell them about Janelle and me.

Why? That had nothing to do with San Hill.

They thought I would lie about it, and my entire testimony would then be suspect. So, I told them the truth, everything.

Anger began to fill Anakin, but he pushed it down and placed his hand on his brother’s. “I’m sorry, Obi-Wan.”

The four of them silently left the room and returned to the temple.

---------

[sara]

and great happiness within the Force.[/i]

Yes, she always come out of meditation smiling, almost glowing. Sometimes I envy her. Sometimes I cannot clear my mind enough, and then I feel sort of..... uneven. He paused. Qui-Gon, do you know where Obi-Wan is? Do you know if he is all right?

Yes, I do and, yes, he is all right.

Excited, Anakin spoke aloud. “Where is he? Tell me where he is! And why can’t I feel him?”

Do you expect me to solve all of your problems, Anakin? You must find your own way in the living world. Do not worry about Obi-Wan.

But how can I not worry? He is like my brother.

Yes, I know. He has a great love for you, too.

Well, can you tell me anything? What is he doing? Why doesn’t he let us know where he is? Is he—

Anakin, you must let it go. Obi-Wan is following a different path, now. One that you cannot help him with. Anakin dropped his head and sighed. I don’t understand. Will he ever come back?

Trust in the Force, my friend. Now, I must go. And you must find the one who needs you. Goodbye......

Goodbye, Qui-Gon. Anakin rose and turned toward the cockpit. The one who needs me? What? Who is that? Qui-Gon? Qui-Gon! “d**n!“

---------

As the sun’s light slowly diminished in the early evening, Janelle walked out onto the front porch of their home, expecting to find her father and Cohl. Only Willem was there, comfortably ensconced in a cushioned wicker chair.

“Where is Cohl, Papa?” she asked, taking a chair next to him.

“Off for a walk, I think,” Willem replied, his gaze lingering on the trees nearby. “He seemed a little preoccupied with something, but didn’t appear to want to talk about it. He said he wanted to go off and think.”

“Well. Do you know where he went?” she asked, beginning to rise from her seat.

He grabbed her arm and pulled her back down, saying, “I expect he wants to be alone, Janelle.”

She looked at her father in surprise. “Papa, why shouldn’t I go find him? Maybe I can help him.”

“Janney,” he said, leaning over toward her, “a man wants to be alone to think about things. He doesn’t need a woman comin’ by, trying to help. Just let him be. If he wants you to know what it is, he’ll tell you.”

A little put off, she nonetheless nodded and eased herself back into the chair and waited. She never had understood a man’s need to isolate himself from everyone around him, just to think about something, or..... be mad or whatever. She recalled how exasperated she used to become when Whit Sumter, her husband, would stomp off and insist on being alone right in the middle of an argument. But, he always came back calm, often bearing an apology, if not flowers or something else. She shook her head and smiled. I guess the sexes really are different. I don’t suppose we’ll ever entirely understand one another.

After a bit, Willem stood and announced, “I’m going to check on Essie and Shayla; make sure they’re settled in for the night.” On his way past Janelle, he patted her hand. “Sure, Pop,” she said. “Call me if you need me.” She watched him make his way into the barn, and then leaned her head against the back of the chair. She wondered how much longer her father would be around. He certainly wasn’t that old, but this life had taken its toll on him. She supposed she would have to hire someone to help out, eventually. Unless Cohl stayed.....

“Hello, there.” She jerked upright in the chair, turned and saw the man in her thoughts coming around the side of the porch and up the stairs. “Whoa, I’m sorry if I startled you,” he said, holding his hands up in front of him. “I guess I should have made more noise.”

“No, no, I’m fine,” she replied. “I was just thinking about things.”

“Anything in particular?” he asked, lowering himself into a chair next to hers.

“Oh, just musing about Pop, life, that kind of stuff.” She paused, waiting to see if he would say anything about his reason for taking a walk. But he just looked at her, a little smile lingering around the corners of his mouth. A bit self-conscious, she pushed her hair back and asked, “So, how was your walk? Did you see anything interesting?”

Sitting back in his chair and looking out at the ranch before them, he replied, “No, but I heard some birds singing. By the time I started back, it was pretty quiet. I guess they’re bedding down for the night.” A long silence followed, during which Janelle tried not to fidget. Just as she decided he was not going to be forthcoming about anything, he leaned forward with his hands clasped and his elbows on his knees and said, “I’ve had the strangest sensation today, Janelle.” She waited for him to explain. He turned to her and went on. “I feel like there is something missing, a part of me that I used to have that is not there anymore. I can’t really explain it.” She was just about to speak, when he stood, walked to the porch railing and said, “It’s not my memory. I’ve had a few days without that, and that’s pretty strange in itself, but this is different.”

“Well, what is it like, this sensation you’re having? Is it a physical thing?”

“No, it’s not physical. And it’s more a lack of something, something familiar. I...I feel like it’s very close, like I could almost reach out and touch it. But then there’s nothing there.” He turned to her with an almost helpless look in his eyes and sighed. She joined him by the railing and laid her hand on his arm. “I don’t know, Cohl. I can’t imagine what it would be.”

He looked down at her hand, and covered it with his own. Their eyes met and held. Feeling blood rushing to her face, Janelle pulled her hand free and pushed her light brown hair back from her neck. “My, it feels a little warm now, don’t you think?” she said, looking away and trying not to appear flustered. Actually, he thought it was a little on the cool side, but after a moment he replied, “Yes, I suppose it is a little warm.” She turned and seemed unable to decide where to go. Cohl said, “There’s a breeze now. Why don’t we sit here and cool off?” With his hand on her back, he guided her to her chair, and sat down himself.

After a few moments of silence, Janelle was very happy to see her father exit the barn and approach the house. “So, are they all settled in?” she called out, a little too loudly. As he mounted the steps, Willem replied, “Oh, yes, they’re very happy, munching on a late snack. You’re back, Cohl. Get everything straightened out?” Janelle looked pointedly at her father, wondering why he was allowed to ask Cohl about his concern, when she wasn’t. Willem glanced at her and smiled at he grunted, lowering himself into his favorite wicker chair.

“No, not really,” Cohl answered. “I was just telling Janelle about it.” He leaned toward the old man. “You know how you feel if you can’t use one of your hands or your arms, like when you’ve injured one of them?” Willem nodded. “That’s how I feel now, like there’s something I can’t do that I used to be able to do. I know it sounds kind of silly, and it’s probably just because I have no idea who or what I am, but still.....”

Willem watched him and nodded. “I understand the feeling you’re talking about, but I don’t know what it would be that you can’t do. Are you sure it isn’t just because of your memory loss?”

Cohl shrugged and said, “No, I’m not sure. It is very strange, not having any past other than the last several days. I suppose that must be what it is.” He sighed and shrugged his shoulders.

“Janelle, we’re running short on qualor oats and we need some new curry combs and brushes,” Willem said. Janelle replied, “I’ll go into town and get some, Papa. There are some things I need, too, so I can just get everything on the same trip.” Just as Cohl was about to speak up, Willem said to him, “Tomorrow, I’d like to show you the tack we use to show Essie, Cohl. Unless you want to go into town with Janney.”

“No, that’s fine, Willem. I’ll stay here. I am interested to learn everything I can about how you do things here. I want to be of some use,” Cohl replied. He hoped his disappointment didn’t show on his face; he would like to have accompanied Janelle tomorrow. However, as the three of them sat and talked into the evening, he realized he was looking forward to learning more about the ranch and how they lived here. I think this would be a good place to live. There are good, solid people here..... at least, the only two I know are.

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(end of Chapter 11)[/quote]